Tatems 4 Month Doctors Appointment

Remember, this blog is also my journal so please don't judge me for the things I report. It's simply for record purposes. However, at the end of this post, if you feel my baby is advanced for her age, then I wont stop you.

We miraculously arrived on time for our appointment, the nurse took us to the back and had us strip Tatem down to her onise and a dry diaper in preparation for weighing in. Well, once again, her outfit did not consist of a onies, so she was naked in the cold dr's office sporting only a cute hair bow and a diaper.

She weighed in at a whopping 13 pounds!

She has moved from the 5th percentile in everything to the 25th percentile in everything. And like a good mother, I have no idea what that means.

While waiting for the Doctor, Tatem ripped to shreds the ineffective germ protecting butcher paper that was pulled over the examination table. And, like a good mother, I didn't stop her.

And just as the Doctor came into the room, I picked Tatem up off the table only to find that the table was completely soaked and the butcher paper was now a consistency of paper mache, the kind that makes a great pinata! (We must have used one of those liquid repellent diapers that seem to surface every once in a while.) So, like a good mother, I let the daddy clean it up. And like a good daddy, he made use of a good 40 feet of the butcher paper to mop up the wetness. Are we white trash, or what?

We were given a sheet of paper titled "4 month milestones: what all babies should be doing by their 4th month" We were to put a check by all that applied.

say mama
sign mama
say mama in Chinese
sign 12 barnyard animals
say moo and meow
walk with limited assistance
eat steak
do own laundry

Well, crap, my child doesn't do all that!

So, I guess as punishment for her lack of advancement they gave Tatem some kind of awful tasting medicine they expected her to swallow, and three shots. She was ticked. But I guess it's her own fault for only knowing how to sign 5 barnyard animals and liking chicken instead of steak!

When asked how she liked her trip to the doctors office today, Tatem had this to say:She's making the spitting raspberry sound because she can do that even though it was not on the list of things a 4 month old should be able to do. SEE! Isn't she so advanced for her age?