Seriously! When do people with children find time to update their blogs? Cute stories. Cute pictures. Cute blog layouts! I'm jealous! When do you find the time? I only have a husband and a hemorrhoid that flares up everyone once in a while and I can't keep up! (Picture not included. You're welcome!)

SO MUCH has happened in my life in the last two weeks that there is no way I can catch up. And because I hate BULK BLOGGING almost more than I hate forwarded emails, I will attempt to update one story at a time, more frequently*.

*Don't hold your breath

The good ol' BSA has an annual
GOLF OUTING FOR SCOUTING.
Although Ian would much rather
be a participant in the event,
I MADE him be a volunteer. We were assigned Hole 4,
par 3, slight up hill, 187 yard, over the lake, pin placement in center of the green,
a sporadically gusty breeze to the right, forest lining the right, sand trap to the left.
There was a 40 foot circle drawn around the pin.
For only $5, a golfer could double his money if he hit the ball into the circle.
I was the attractive carnival caller/money collector at the tee box.
Ian was the handsome circle monitor on the green.

Ian also was a self-appointed caddy to any golfer who wasn't looking for caddy advise. He had plenty of time in between teams to read the greens with the balls he found in the trees, which were many. So, there I am all day, thinking I'm so cute, asking all these men to hand over their money to participate in the "HIT IT IN THE CIRCLE" game! It required a bit of coaxing/flirting to get the money, batting my eyelashes, flashing my mother of pearly whites, and exposing my witt and charm. Three hours, and about 140 participants later, another volunteer shows up to relieve me for a 5 min break. With wide eyes and a pointed finger at my face, he yells,

"WHOA!!! You have a HUGE mosquito bite on your chin!! It's so big! WOW, I've never seen anything so huge before! Doesn't that hurt? Oh my gosh, it's GIGANTIC!"
I reach up to check the validity of his proclamation to the world and, sure enough, my chin was nearly numb by the sheer pressure of the swelling! IT WAS HUGE!
First thought: How long has that been there and how many people saw it!?!?
Second thought: I'm not cute at all!! Who was I kidding!
Third thought: Were the golfers giving me money to play the game OR did they think they were donating to my future plastic surgery to remove the growing tumor from my chin!!?!?!?

To the Club House STAT!

With the Michigan breeze thrashing through my hair, I furiously sped off in my golf cart reaching speeds of nearly 3 miles per hour! After driving through a few sand traps, I drove right into the camouflaged swamplands near the 17th faraway. I prayed, "please little golf cart, please don't get stuck. Not here. Not now." I started to bounce up and down on my seat, hoping to free myself from the swallowing mud hole. Mud was flinging in all directions, including up my back, from the spinning tires. At last, I reach the Club House to assess the damage!
GOSH! I'm already board of my own story! This is taking forever to tell!
See! I hate to blog!
I quit!
Blah, blah, blah, we had a great day.
The end.